Činjenice o Hrvatskoj i drugim zemljama

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Post 21 Jan 2015, 16:08

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Inde ... Of_Croatia

It has been said that "Croatia and the Croatian people are the only ex-Yugoslavians who were right!". And as long as you discount the whole "invading Hercecgovina and blowing up a 600 year old bridge for no good reason", it is generally held to be true.

Once someone does something noble to help you out, they just won't stop bragging about it: "Ja sam tebi brate tada pomogo, a ti meni ovako sad!"

When Croats aren't talking about Serbs, they brag about how much you can curse in Croatian, with curse words that proudly can't be translated into any other language. Every other word in Croatian is kurac, which can mean anything.

:D

Otkrijte vama najbolje činjenice o Hrvatskoj i drugim zemljama na uncyclopediji. Meni se svidjelo. :D


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Post 21 Jan 2015, 18:06

:rofl:
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Post 21 Jan 2015, 18:09

Image

Motto (unofficial): "We'll be in the EU in 2054 - 100 years before Serbia."
National Anthem: Mr Saxobeat
Official language Not Serbian
Capital Zagreb ("Scratch City")
Government Catholic Oligarchy Masquerading as Democratic Republic
President John Of Little Josephs (Ivo Josipovič)
Best actress Ševerina Vučković alias Ševe (stolen video)
Currency Fox
Population Not many, due to the wolves
Religion TV, followed by ritual coffee drinking.

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..a unda
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Post 21 Jan 2015, 18:15

Dalmatinci in General

Dalmatinci are well known for their tradition of singing about work, and not actually doing any work. When doing work (probably every fifty years, i.e. two times in a lifetime), an enormous amount of vino (Wine) must be consumed so that the individual can forget that he or she did anything, as work is considered disgraceful.

Culture

Every dalmatian must be like every other dalmatian. If you are not blending in, and trying to do something new, inventive, or simply different, you become 'furest' ('foreigner', 'outsider'). Furesti are evil creatures of darkness, and their mission is to destroy everything sacred to us, and they are to be stoned to death on sight. If by any chance the local community is not developed enough to perform a public stoning to death, furesti are to be laughed at from safe distance, or in large groups in posession of baseball bats or grenade launchers.

Language

Dalmatian language is an interesting and unique linguistical experience. Every city has its own language, or at least a new way of interpreting the bleeding obvious. Words must be twisted and messed up so badly, that only the people in your nearest vicinity can understand you. Most frequently used letter for making up new words is the letter 'O'.

For example, the word 'egg', normally spelled 'jaje' is 'joje' in dalmatian. That however, does not mean that the next crappy village won't spell it 'jojo', and therefore 'yoyo', implying that everyone there is listening to crap. Buying eggs at the local store would get a completely new meaning.

Crippling words is very popular. For example, ˝ovdje˝ (here) is said, and spelled ˝ode˝ in Dalmatia.

Dalmatinci also speak the "cool-way" by "Dalmatianizing" the language such as changing the spelling and pronunciation of words (Example: Bijela = Bila, Zvijezda = Zvizda, Dijete: Dite) Dalmatinci have been talking this way for centuries because they think it's funny to annoy and confuse the people from Zagreb. In fact, Dalmatinci spell Dalmatinci 'Dinci'.

Also notable is a peculiar inability to recognise the difference between Č and Ć, a two distinct letters of croatian alphabet. It appears that to most dalmatians those two letters are hard-boiled and soft-boiled eggs, since they refer to them as hard (tvrdo) and soft (meko)

.. In general, Dalmatians need to improve their social skills to Stone age.

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Dalmatians

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Post 21 Jan 2015, 18:17

Image

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Post 21 Jan 2015, 18:49

Prije bi reka da u Dalmaciji ne postoji hard-boiled č. Samo ovo drugo :D
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Post 21 Jan 2015, 20:53

MightyMe » wrote:Prije bi reka da u Dalmaciji ne postoji hard-boiled č. Samo ovo drugo :D

zapravo, samo srednje ili preciznije meko Č i tvrdo Ć :giggle:
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